Speaking of inventions and discoveries, I just learned that an eminent scientist in Ohio has developed a pill that contains all the nutritive value of three complete meals. In addition to providing us with vitamins and minerals we need daily, this pill also gives a feeling of fullness. According to its sponsors, the pill will nourish and satisfy. I hate to disparage such a laudable achievement, but to me it seems like a most objectionable discovery. Rather than a scientific triumph, I’d be inclined to label it as egregious blunder, a scientific disaster, a laboratory fiasco. Is there anyone in his right mind who thinks that a pill can replace the pleasures of devouring hot corn bread, masticating on a thick steak, biting into crisp french-fries, or attacking a chocolate sundae? I’m afraid that this is one pill I’ll have to eschew from chewing.

Definitions:

1. disparage                             a. to discredit, belittle
2. laudable                               b. avoid
3. fiasco                                  c. to chew up
4. masticate                             d. praiseworthy
5. eschew                                e. complete failure